OT, Help for essay: Communicating with Greeks

[Zalgirinis]

Hello all my greek friends Actually the help of JCN and Highlander as being foreigners, who most communicate with greeks, could be great as well (as any other poster).

So, what I need is ~4 pages essay with topic "Case of Intercultural Communications: Greeks". I could have chosen any culture I communicated with, but as I was 2 times (overall a month) in Greece it was easy choice. The thing is it has to be out of two parts. First, the general attibutes of communicating with Greeks, their peculiarity, common things they do and stuff. The 2nd part is my personal experience communicating with them.

Your help about the general part would be very appreciated. Well, I could give some hints what it could be or you can skip this part and tell anything you want about communcation with greeks.

How do people greet each other, how they introduce, what is the distance between talking people, do they tend to speak loud in public places. Puctuality, how much minutes is acceptable to be late: to the meeting? to the party (more official)? meeting of the friends?

Do people use nonverbal communication much (gestures, signs, moving hands while talking)? How long does it take to trust unknown person? How do people look to conflict situations, how they act then? How do people look to task making (manjana - tommorow, imedetialy, wait till deadline?). How decision making is done (only bosses decide or regular workers can make decisions too?). How do people react to power (president as equal as worker? older people are more respected than younger people?). How open people are, are they emotional to first met person, foreigner? And etc etc.

Its just hints/questions you can answer and theres much more you can say about communication, so feel free to add anything you want. Few sentences can be as much helpful as long answers and I'll be thankful for anything you provide me here

[HIGHLANDER]

As i live in Greece at the moment and my girl is Greek i could give you a reasonable insight, however if anyone disagrees (Greeks), feel free to correct me as you would know better than me.
The very first thing i noticed while being around Greeks is they look and sound as if they are arguing or disagreeing about something all the time. They are actually not- they are just having a normal conversation as any of us would. It's just that they speak very loudly with the voice levels raising up and down with a lot of hand movement.
The next thing i notice is they are a little reluctant of the foreigner at first but this does not last long as once you break that initial barrier they are very warm
and friendly people. Quite interesting to talk to i would say as well. They also hugely respect you if you try to speak a little Greek.
Don't expect things to happen on time in Greece because they usually won't.
Greeks never usually make plans it tends to be on the spur of the moment that they may do something. They have a formal and informal way of greeting people who are young and old. If you know someone well usually they do the kiss on both cheeks thing and that goes for the men as well when they are good friends.
If you see a Greek confrontation you will definitely know. It will become very loud and aggressive.
I think Greeks are very educated about the world. In other words they know what is exactly going on around them without any bullshit propaganda. They will stand up for there rights as well.
To finish off- i love Greece and the people, they are very passionate about there country and are not afraid to stand up for themselves which reminds me a lot of my on country but with a better climate.

[KokkinosVasilias]

do they tend to speak loud in public places.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!?

lol

Our fellow Scotsman is correct about everything...
i dont know if you should include in your essay the most used greek word
it can be used as the worst insult as well as for greeting your dearest friend!

[Zalgirinis]

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!?

lol

Yea, now when I read it sounds crazy Simply I wrote down those questions from my conspects of the subject. I sure know how you people talk

Another aspect you could tell me more is your communication at table. How do you sit (any order, couples in front of each other or side by side), who starts eating first (do other people wait for someone to start eating), is the host responsible for leading conversation or the guests, how do you put fork and knife after you finish eating and etc.

And another very important question, what topics should foreigners dont touch during conversation?

[Victorious]

they are very passionate about there country and are not afraid to stand up for themselves which reminds me a lot of my on country but with a better climate.

You know. Quite some cultural anthropologists claim that Greeks and Scots have many similarities. There are even books on the issue. Many people have compared the two, especially in the 19th century when they both had a great desire for freedom.

[mktackabery]

I thought it was only because they were both loud, hairy and drunk.

[HIGHLANDER]

Oops, better be careful Michele. I know the stereotype of Greeks in the US and it is just a stereotype.
I'm sure u are just joking though

[EverGreen]

Yea, now when I read it sounds crazy Simply I wrote down those questions from my conspects of the subject. I sure know how you people talk

Another aspect you could tell me more is your communication at table. How do you sit (any order, couples in front of each other or side by side), who starts eating first (do other people wait for someone to start eating), is the host responsible for leading conversation or the guests, how do you put fork and knife after you finish eating and etc.

And another very important question, what topics should foreigners dont touch during conversation?

In regards to communication on the table and where everyone sits. It's usually the men on one side of the table and next to each other, the women on the other since they have their own discussion topics. The hosts will be the last ones to sit since they will be the ones serving. Many a time they will tell their guests to start eating whilst they finish getting the last things needed. But guests never start without the hosts having sat down.

In regards to the conversations and who starts them, this is chaotic, anyone can start on any partucular subject but it is usually the guest who will toast to the hosts health raising their glasses thanking them for the invite and wishing the best to family's health and well as success of the children.

The women are the ones that finish eating first because they don't really eat that much. The men on the other hand will stuff themselves to their stomachs content. Women mainly won't each much although they may still be hungry.

One thing that the female host will do is say to you, "Almantas, I see your plate is empty... you didn't eat anything. Pass it here, what would you like, steak? pasta?, rice? etc." This although you have already eaten a mountain of food and you are undoing your top trouser button. They will insist and insist until they wear you down and if you insist on nothing, they will still put something in your plate and then make a comment to the female next them how you didnt eat anything

A Greek female at the table will never accept "I'm full, thanks". You are pretty much forced to take something just to shut them up. A lot of the time, if you do say "I'm fine, thanks". They will ask you "why? don't you like it?" This leads to other troubles where they will offer to cook you something else.

Most important table tip in Greece? "Compliment the cooking!!!"

2nd tip...Eat slow, that way you won't be having your plate topped up every 10 minutes.

3rd tip...make sure, if you have a girlfriend with you, that at the end of the dinner she gets up to help the housekeeper clean up the table and help with the dishes. In Greece, that is the womans job and females who don't offer to help are seen as lazy and disrespectful by other females. The housekeeper will always say "No, no, you're a guest, sit down blah, blah.. but the truth is that they want another womans(ens) company to do the most tedious task washing 50 plates and glasses.

That's how it's done in my town of Mytilene. The women will clean up and the men will sit either around the dinner table or in the living room talking about what they talk about. Women get to do that in the kitchen since they will help with the female host with giving out the desert.

I must also mention that before the grown ups, the children are fed first and usually sit on another table.

[EverGreen]

You know. Quite some cultural anthropologists claim that Greeks and Scots have many similarities. There are even books on the issue. Many people have compared the two, especially in the 19th century when they both had a great desire for freedom.

Biggest differance is that we are not scrooges with money!!

I've known 5 Scots, all of them tight feckers!!!

[HIGHLANDER]

Biggest differance is that we are not scrooges with money!!

I've known 5 Scots, all of them tight feckers!!!

1st- Scots being tight is a stereotype.
2nd- you sound like a complete idiot (very sexist). I assume you are from some small village where you still live in the past. Ya fud

[mktackabery]

Oops, better be careful Michele. I know the stereotype of Greeks in the US and it is just a stereotype.
I'm sure u are just joking though

of course, just kidding, but all the Scots in my family and all my Greek friends unfortunately fit the stereotype to a T.

But no offense meant.

[T.W.Is.M.]

Don't expect things to happen on time in Greece because they usually won't.

U can say that again!!!

[EverGreen]

1st- Scots being tight is a stereotype.
2nd- you sound like a complete idiot (very sexist). I assume you are from some small village where you still live in the past. Ya fud

1st ...My Scottish mates admit it themselves.

2nd point..why am I sexist? As for the complete idiot, we can perhaps hook up in Athens when I come over in January and you call repeat it face to face.

[Trifilli]

Guys, relax...

What EverGreen wrote is indeed the traditional view on things, something you'll still find in quite some villages on the countryside. Actually I usually spend a couple of weeks each year on Mytilini and I must say that it's one of the most untouched islands in Greece. Still I was a guest in households where the men also helped with the dishes or even cooked, no big deal. However in villages like Lisvori something alike won't happen too fast.
In villages on Mytilini you'll also still find another traditional rule: the men are meeting in the kafeneio (traditional cafe) at the villages main square, while the women meet at the church. But even this changes now and the last time I was in a traditional kafeneio on Mytilini (in Vrissa) there were women drinking their coffee there as well. In fact one old man complained to me that the times are changing and that the women from Athens are breaking all the old rules, even playing the komboloi
Athens is a different story anyways. As it is a city with inhabitants from all over Greece, with a lot of Greeks who're living abroad half the year and a lot of people who lived abroad and returned, there's a big mixture of traditions there. At the same time it's a modern city where the old rules have less place every year and already disappeared in many places.
People like my Grandma still enforce them though and the first time I brought my german GF there she almost had to overthrow from all the food. Good hint: In such a situation you have to say that you have stomach problems and therefore can't eat that much, helped her ever since
As for the food rules: It's usually also impolite to say that you want more, like EG said you get asked anyways and usually you should reply with a "no" first, as you're gonna get more anyways. Don't be so sure in Athens though, it happened to me that I wanted to be polite and left hungry
One also has to keep in mind that there are countless people especially in the big cities who studied or lived abroad for a long time, and these people of course came back with different experiences and often changed a lot of things. So in the end it all depends on whom you meet and what kind of background the family/person has.

[final countdown]

My other greek friends covered a lot of issues already.

In Greece family matters a lot. For example in a typical greek family the parents don't spend money for themselves. They keep it to help their children. The biggest dream of a typical greek parent is to built a house for his/her children. An other aspect of the typical greek family is that children don't leave their parent's house until they get married. So u can see people even 30 years old still living with their parents.

In Greece most people spent their Sunday morning in church especially in places out of Athens and Thessaloniki. This is happening mostly with the elder which consider themselves good christians. As a result the leader of the greek orthodox church is a very powerful person in Greece.

The dream of the typical greek is to enter a public service. Once they enter they stop working since they can't be fired. That's the main reason nothing is working in greek state agencies.

Another aspect of greek daylife is politics. In Greece for almost everything u need a politician to help u. That's why most people are registered in PASOK or Nea Dimokratia. I have to admitt that this has started to change but not fast enough.

Another problem is the attitude "why to do something today since u can do it tomorrow or the day after".

There so many things i can tell...........